But there are many times when I just don't feel like writing. When my fingers feel wooden.
What helps then? Reading, reading a lot, different genres, until words, the rhythm of words beats in my bloodstream, and I yearn to get them out on the page.
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And what when it comes to prayer, and I feel dead, numb, a lifeless thing without joy, or love or thought? But I have a committment to pray, and pray I will.
I used to read scripture and read it until my heart said "Amen." I now practice eucharisteo, giving thanks, giving thanks for all the beautiful and lovely things in the world, and in my life. I give thanks, and give thanks, and give thanks, while the plane of my emotions slowly, reluctantly slides down the runway, and takes off into the blue, sunny skies of praise and joy.
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I thought I would update this post with a couple of comments
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I thought I would update this post with a couple of comments
Digitalnun said...- When the well of prayer runs dry, one can also just remain quietly waiting, with no thought, no attempt even to give thanks, but a 'pure, naked intent unto God' as the author of the Cloud of Unknowing puts it. The prayer is in the intention, not in any act of will/expression of devotion/gratitude. Sometimes, even giving thanks is beyond us, isn't it?
- Thanks, Digital Nun. I grew up Catholic, and wanted to be a nun. I even spent 14 months as an aspirant and postulant at Mother Teresa's Convent.
I learned there the value of regular times of prayer, even when one feels as lifeless and emotionless as a stick.
It's then that I feel with Richard Foster that prayer feels not just like "a waste of time, but a waste of self."
So I guess there is value in the relationship, in just showing up, whether the Loved One chooses to speak, or remain silent.
When the well of prayer runs dry, one can also just remain quietly waiting, with no thought, no attempt even to give thanks, but a 'pure, naked intent unto God' as the author of the Cloud of Unknowing puts it. The prayer is in the intention, not in any act of will/expression of devotion/gratitude. Sometimes, even giving thanks is beyond us, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteThanks, Digital Nun. I grew up Catholic, and wanted to be a nun. I even spent 14 months as an aspirant and postulant at Mother Teresa's Convent.
ReplyDeleteI learned there the value of regular times of prayer, even when one feels as lifeless and emotionless as a stick.
It's then that I feel with Richard Foster that prayer feels not just like "a waste of time, but a waste of self."
So I guess there is value in the relationship, in just showing up, whether the Loved One chooses to speak, or remain silent.
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