I thought it would be good to
have a break in which children and adults had a chance to worship God, and soak
in the love of the Father, get re-acquainted more deeply with Jesus, and be
filled again with the Holy Spirit
Anyway, this lovely Irish guy called
Simon Foster, who looks a bit like Hugh Grant, walks on stage to preach, and
something about his bleached blonde hair, his walk, his face, alerts my gaydar.
I whisper to Roy, “He’s gay.”
“Ssssh,” Roy says.
And then Simon sweetly giggles a little
bit. Laughs. Says a few sentences, flings his head back, then bursts into song
in the most gorgeous singing voice I’ve ever heard from a Christian worship
leader.
There’s an indefinable something…
“He’s definitely gay,” I whisper
to Roy.
Roy says, “Sssh. He’s an Elim
Pentecostal leader.”
I am chastened and silent,
wondering if my gaydar gave a false reading.
And then Simon says, “Well, I was
trapped in a homosexual lifestyle from many years, but now am married.”
“What did I say, Roy?” I whisper
triumphantly, and Roy looks properly flabbergasted.
*
* *
Simon Foster has told his story here. He was a Eurovision contestant, and came 10th with
his band, the Duskeys, and then stepped into a life of show-biz, singing in
nightclubs and cruises, drinking, substance abuse and homosexuality, which he
gives up after an encounter with the love of God, and after he reads the Bible
verses about homosexuality which he becomes convinced is sin.
In his case, the move was
definitely a blessing. It released him to a fruitful ministry (prophecy,
healing, and preaching) in the body of Christ, which is not easily available to
practising homosexuals in most Christian denominations.
He said yesterday, “All my life I
have been waiting for a man to ravish me. And in Jesus, I’ve found him”
What? Several people looked
affronted or offended, and Simon laughed and said, “Oh, I see your religious
spirit rising.”
·
*
*
This is how Simon explains his
homosexuality “I was set up for homosexuality through circumstances of life. I had a
dysfunctional relationship with my dad, which left me feeling unloved and
unwanted. My attempt to connect with others boys at school failed which only
compounded my feeling that males rejected me. The name-calling and continued
rejection left me with nowhere to belong.
Years of living with
this identity problem produced a fantasy life in which I dreamed of men
desiring me. The pull to engage with men sexually followed. The father I
desired became the man of my dreams and led me to develop homosexual
relationships.”
I am sure he believes his
narrative that his life’s circumstances led to his homosexuality, but that does
not explain how within minutes of observing his face, his hairstyle and
colouring, subtle make-up, gait, demeanour, speech, voice, laugh, I realised he
was a gay man, or post-gay in this case.
It certainly seemed ontological,
as well as circumstantial to me.
*
* *
For each Christian gay man or
woman who marries and becomes heterosexual, there are many who fail in their
quest to do so, to their own heart-brokenness.
And I think of Lonnie Frisbee, the most
influential gay man in twentieth century Christianity, a key person in the
Jesus People or Jesus Freak movement, who unleashed a wave of the Holy Spirit
which was instrumental in the founding, and phenomenal growth of two major Christian denominations, the Calvary
Chapel to which he attracted thousands to his Bible Study, and the Vineyard, which was established after
Lonnie Frisbee asked youth, 25 and under, to come forward, then prayed, “Come Holy
Spirit.” And those so filled baptised others in hot tubs and swimming pools!!
Lonnie struggled against
his homosexuality, to the point of getting married to a wife who left him after
an affair with their pastor; was sad and guilty about his repeated homosexual flings; was rejected by both denominations he helped found and flourish when
his homosexuality became obvious, and died broken hearted of AIDS, yet forgiving
those whose careers and denominations he had established, but who ostracised
him and almost wrote him out of their histories for a sin he could not shake.
And yet he was responsible for thousands of people being
converted and filled with the Holy Spirit, and
changed the direction of twentieth century Christianity through the millions
influenced by the Calvary Chapel and the Vineyard Movement.
God’s blessing and anointing was
on his life, perhaps because of his brokenness; perhaps because his
unsuccessful struggle with what he saw as his sin (homosexuality) convinced him
he needed a saviour and needed forgiveness, and led him to intensely love the
one who forgave him.
*
* *
What interests me is that Lonnie
partied on Saturday, including promiscuous gay sex, and preached powerfully on
Sunday.
I doubt he was a hypocrite. I
fancy it’s like the overweight who eat chocolate, and then preach; those who
have a drink too many and then preach; those who are foul to their spouses and
kids and bully their parishioners, and then preach.
And sometimes God blesses their
preaching for the sake of those who will listen to them, as he blessed Lonnie
Frisbee.
We see sin on a continuum with
abortion and homosexuality at the far end of the spectrum. Jesus did not see
sin on a continuum. One should not
murder nor be angry, he teaches. One should not commit adultery nor lust over
women, he teaches. (Matt 5 21-27).
Perhaps Jesus did not see Frisbee’s
sin of promiscuous gay sex as worse than the little gossip, pettiness, envy and
meanness which good church people are guilty of.
Lonnie Frisbee fascinates me, and
I will probably research and write about him some more.
I loved this. It resonates a lot with what I recently wrote on my blog.
ReplyDeleteMaybe God doesn't see things as we've interpreted them after all these years...you were just a whole lot more graceful in how you wrote it. That Elim preacher sounds awesome!
This was excellent.
ReplyDeleteGod is love
jpu
Just think how much more Lonnie Frisbee could have done (without feeling constantly like a hypocrite, which must have taken on incredible toll on his ministry
ReplyDelete) if he was allowed to get married to a man.
My jury's still out. After reading and listening to Chris Yuan, who believes we are called to holy sexuality, I think that is the answer. Out of a Far Country, is the name of his and his mother's book. Not my only source. The Bible promotes marriage between a man and a woman, but Philip was sent to the eunuch. God loves and calls us, He ravishes us and wants us to be filled with Him. All sin is equal in His sight, which is why Jesus died on the cross. We cannot live by the law. But we are called now to be holy as God is holy. Set apart, different. Yes, He will use a donkey or rocks if He has to to get His message across. But we are called to be His witnesses.
ReplyDeleteAnd Brad Pitt could play Lonnie Frisbee in the movie adaption of your book.
ReplyDeleteThanks, everyone. Yes, I think Lonnie's story is really heart-breaking. Mollie, was just thinking of another post on Lonnie, not a book. There is a good documentary out on his life.
ReplyDeleteI was half joking about the book. In the picture, though, he does look like Brad Pitt and I think as an actor, he could get the conflict.
ReplyDeleteInteresting in church today we had a couple named Mathias leaving for the mission field. She is a professor and he is a librarian. Two small girls. Our sermon was on grace from John 8. The songs had to do with breaking chains, giving our all to Jesus and of course, Amazing Grace. I thought of you the whole time.
Perhaps the great turmoil men like Frisbee undergo is because they are convinced by the evangelical template/mindset that they need to deny their sexuality. Authentic Homosexuality is not a choice...to therefore deny it is to state that God made a mistake...or lots of mistakes. Perhaps, also, it may be helpful to avoid the stereotypical examples of those who have had abusive beginnings as reason for particular sexuality. Interesting how we tend to reinterpret scripture to suit our bias. So much in scripture we bypass because it is so beyond our cultural view...hats...women...eating habits...nocturnal emissions...etc...yet we continue on favorite roundabouts without really addressing the issues. I am not gay...but recognize that we have done great disservice to those who are through no choice. Whilst this article makes helpful comparison with other 'sin' it still follows the well worn track of cliche and sound bites the evangelical ''right' like to travel without addressing the interpretational / contextual aspects of scripture as we so readily do in other areas...(women for example). Lonnie Frisbee birthed two movements....perhaps God was making a statement here?
ReplyDeleteAnon. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteLonnie Frisbee birthed two movements....perhaps God was making a statement here?
Yes, indeed.
"Whilst this article makes helpful comparison with other 'sin'"
The "sin" I was referring to was the promiscuous, casual sex on Saturday nights before preaching on Sunday. And then I tried to work out why God might have blessed his preaching anyway.
Anonymous wrote: "Perhaps the great turmoil men like Frisbee undergo is because they are convinced by the evangelical template/mindset that they need to deny their sexuality."
ReplyDeleteI do agree with that. Of the many LGBT people I know (through involvement in Changing Attitude, Courage and the Gay Christian Network) some are celibate, others in relationships and others have married - and a good number of those have then found they should never have married anyway and have divorced and formed same sex relationships.
The happiest people in these organisations seems to me to be those who came to terms with their sexuality in time and choose to have committed same sex relationships. That does not mean that LGBT people in other situations or describing other experiences do not deserve and need support and affirmation as well though - they very much do.
Thank you Anita for having the courage to compare homosexuality to gossip or drunkenness or unforgiveness. I saw a post recently that said, "Don't judge me because I sin differently than you." I think the Christian focus has become much to pinpointed to the "major" sins and giving everyone a pass on the "minor" ones. We need to be careful that we don't become the older brother in the tale of the prodigal son. I know I have been both the prodigal and the other brother. If Jesus were alive today, He would be hanging out with all of "those people" we in the church think we are better than. I could go on and on but I will stop with a "bravo" to you for stepping out and giving such a balanced account of what I consider an important truth.
ReplyDeleteP.S. Anon, Lonnie Frisbee was raped at the age of 8 according to the online biographies I've read. So I guess both the gay or post-gay people I've mentioned in this post had sexuality rooted in trauma.
ReplyDeleteA gay Christian psychotherapist I know, Rev. Canon Dr. Beau Stevenson has written a paper http://www.rcpsych.ac.uk/pdf/Beaumont%20Stevenson%20Healing%20by%20Paradox%20in%20the%20Christian%20Tradition.x.pdf
about how the mind deals with trauma such as rape and abuse by taking it and making it a positive. So the raped woman might become a submissive; the raped man, homosexual.
Just his theory!
Sue, Yes, I know of disasters when gay people marry someone of the opposite gender because of their Christian beliefs. It's often tragic for both parties, IMO.
ReplyDeleteENID, welcome to my blog. I didn't know you read it. It's true, Jesus would hang out with gays who feel condemned by the church; or women crushed by the abortion they feel they can never mention in Bible study. We must guard against the narrowing of the heart which Pharisaicism brings!!